Linggo, Oktubre 7, 2012


Panliligaw or ligawan are the Tagalog terms for courtship, which in some parts of the Tagalog-speaking regions is synonymous with pandidiga or digahan (from Spanish diga, 'to say, express').  Manliligaw is the one who courts a girl; nililigawan is the one who is being courted. 
In Philippine culture, courtship is far more subdued and indirect unlike in some Western societies.  A man who is interested in courting a woman has to be discreet and friendly at first, in order not to be seen as too presko or mayabang (aggressive or too presumptuous).  Friendly dates are often the starting point, often with a group of other friends.  Later, couples may go out on their own, but this is still to be done discreetly.  If the couple has decided to come out in the open about their romance, they will tell their family and friends as well. 
In the Philippines, if a  man wants to be taken seriously by a woman, he has to visit the latter's family and introduce himself formally to the parents of the girl.  It is rather inappropriate to court a woman and formalize the relationship without informing the parents of the girl.  It is always expected that the guy must show his face to the girl's family.  And if a guy wants to be acceptable to the girl's family, he has to give pasalubong (gifts) every time he drops by her family's house.   It is said that in the Philippines, courting a Filipina means courting her family as well.
In courting a Filipina, the metaphor often used is that of playing baseball.  The man is said to reach 'first base' if the girl accepts his proposal to go out on a date for the first time.  Thereafter, going out on several dates is like reaching the second and third bases.  A 'home-run' is one where the girl formally accepts the man's love, and they become magkasintahan (from sinta, love), a term for boyfriend-girlfriend. 
During the old times and in the rural areas of the Philippines, Filipino men would make harana (serenade) the women  at night and sing songs of love and affection.  This is basically a Spanish influence.  The man is usually accompanied by his close friends who provide moral support for the guy, apart from singing with him. 
Filipino women are expected to be pakipot (playing hard to get) because it is seen as an appropriate behavior in a courtship dance.   By being pakipot, the girl tells the man that he has to work hard to win her love.  It is also one way by which the Filipina will be able to measure the sincerity of her admirer.  Some courtships could last years before the woman accepts the man's love. 
A traditional dalagang Pilipina (Filipinpa maiden) is someone who is mahinhin (modest, shy, with good upbringing, well-mannered) and does not show her admirer that she is also in love with him immediately.  She is also not supposed to go out on a date with several men.  The opposite of mahinhin is malandi (flirt), which is taboo in Filipino culture as far as courtship is concerned.
After a long courtship, if the couple later decide to get married, there is the Filipino tradition of pamamanhikan (from panik, to go up the stairs of the house), where the man and his parents visit the woman's family and ask for her parents blessings to marry their daughter.  It is also an occasion for the parents of the woman to get to know the parents of the man.

During pamamanhikan, the man and his parents bring some pasalubong (gifts).  It is also at this time that the wedding date is formally set, and the couple become engaged to get married. 

1 komento:

  1. I just lost my man about three months ago though he is back again full of love and passion with the help of great man Dr. IKHIDE. I NORAH PEDRO from Norway, have been into a relationship with daniel mark since I was 22 years old and I am 28 now. I so much love him but I could not show the love, it was very difficult for me to prove my realness to him because I thought to prove my love to him might make him look down on me and go after other girls. for over six years Daniel has given me all that I ask of him. I always threatened him with break up each time I want to see his level of love for me because I was told if I threaten him, he will propose to me and then will get married to him before I can show my love despite his complains of him not sure of my love I was responding to him with negative words. though I was suspecting he has another girl in his life, I did not border to ask him about that because I was so sure of his love despite my attitude. on the 8th of September a day to my birthday he came and gave me so many lovely gifts like never before claiming to wish me a happy birthday in advance with his words and behavior I expected him to propose to me on my birthday night then I will also tell him of my pregnant for him. I wait for him on my birthday he did not show up not even a call, I tried his number and it was not going through I refuse to go check on him because the anger in me six days later I went to his house and I found nothing not even a sign of my Daniel once live there. I was disappointed, frustrated, confused with so many thoughts on my mind like hanging my self if I did not see him again because I can not my parent about the pregnancy when the man responsible for it had disappeared. our religion's against that, my family will be disappointed in me, I have brought them shame. I look for daniel everywhere till I could chat with him on social network, he warned me never to disturb him again because he already had found another girl that he wants to live his life with, after a while, he blocked me from all access then I could not tell him of my pregnancy for him. so, I needed help from all corners of life, I decide to check to google my self or read some write up on-site on how to coup with my pain because I could not tell anybody about it not even my friends were aware of my pregnancy. I keep reading to cancel my self till I find how Dr. IKHIDE helps so many persons from different walks of life with their testimonies. then I decide to also contact him with dr.ikhide@gmail.com. Because I do not know much about contacting a spell caster, I was not sure he can bring my Dan back but I decide to give him a try though his requirement was another problem I meet with a friend for help because I could not the items that he needed I have to plead with Dr. IKHIDE to help me get the items because really need my man back to take away my shame. just two days after I send him the requirement Daniel calls me, plead for forgiveness. just yesterday he propose to me and I am so happy. you can also contact him with dr.ikhide@gmail.com







    TumugonBurahin